I wish that I could fall asleep tonight and something amazing would happen. I would wake up and realize my calling in life. I would realize the meaning and have a purpose an excitement to go forth and meet the day with energy and aspirations. I am 25 years old and still can not keep to one thing. So what do I do? I think and I analyze and I waste my days self loathing and hoping that I will figure out what I want. I am searching and I wish that I could be a kid again with the whole world ahead of me and really understand the truth in living with our decisions. Does everyone my age feel this way??? Somehow I just dont think so.
Time keeps on slipping...
This weekend was my baby cousins wedding.. and She did everything the right way. I feel like I am living in an alternate universe. It was beautiful and pure. Such a lovely wedding. It is weird I find comfort in things that havent changed. I really think if I look at my reasons for going back to my mothers church which I have no for a whole month I really think its because it is old fashioned and feels like home. My motives are not altogether good. but I find comfort in things that never change. My world seems to constantly shift and change around me it feels good to go back to a place that hasnt changed. The hymns and the same friendly faces. The message that always screams to me that I am a sinner... It comforts me in a weird way.
Wow ... Rambling
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